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Saturday, December 31, 2011

New Year's Eve and pathetic

I am 445 pounds and for the first time in a long time I actually feel up to do something fun.  I even have an invite to go somewhere this evening but had to turn it down because I can't do a whole lot of walking and I don't want to slow anyone down because I have to keep stopping.  This shit is getting really old.  I simply can't do it anymore.  I have to make a change in my life so that I can live and when I say live I don't mean stay alive  mean live.  I am 42 years old and I have spend my New Years Eve like someone who is 82 this is completely ridiculous.  I am so over this. 

I have said it once I have said it twice the blogging for me is completely and totally therapeutic so I am going to hope and pray that it assists me in being disciplined, focused, and consistent with my new lifestyle.

This is definitly going to be a challenge as my husband and daughter will not be participating in it with me this go around.  But I have to remain strong and use my blog to help me through the rough patches I know I'm about to go through.  I am going to put in as much energy as I can into my blog so that it will truly reflect the good and the bad of my journey.

Here we go 10 days to D-Day!!!


"This is the last time I will be in the house on New Year's  Eve because of my physical condition"

Hmmm I sure hope Asparagus is in season Now!!!

Asparagus Frittata Recipe

Prep time: 5 minutesCook time: 20 minutesIngredients
2 teaspoons olive oil
1 small onion, thinly sliced
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 pound asparagus, tough ends snapped off, spears cut diagonally into 1-inch lengths
4 large eggs, lightly beaten
1 cup shredded Gruyere or Swiss cheese
1 Heat olive oil into a 10-inch oven-proof frying pan over medium high heat. Add onions and salt and cook, stirring occasionally, until onions are softened, about 3 minutes. Add asparagus, reduce heat to medium-low, and cook, covered, until the asparagus are barely tender, 6 to 8 minutes. Pour in eggs and cook until almost set, but still runny on top, about 2 minutes. While cooking, pre-heat oven broiler.

Recipes provided by Asparagus Frittata

Friday, December 30, 2011

Asparagus Wrapped in Bacon ~ Holy Baconoli!!! Umm Yummm!!!

This will definitely be on the menu for the new lifestyle.  Easy and inexpensive - My combination ;o)

1 pound Asparagus

5 slices of Bacon
Olive Oil
Salt and Pepper

1 Preheat oven to 375ºF.

2 Lightly coat asparagus in olive oil, salt, and pepper. Wrap bunches of 5 or 6 together with a piece of bacon (or two).
3 Cook for 12 to 15 minutes, flip, then continue to cook another 5 to 8 minutes.

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Almost ready to begin a new journey

It's Christmas early afternoon and all I can think about is how excited I am to again get ready to attempt this journey.  I have found out so much about myself in just the past few months to include that I suffer from severe depression and PTSD.  I am now being medicated for both and I feel more hopeful about my future than I have ever felt. 

I have begin to study the Atkins book to refresh my memory as to how the diet works again.   I want to do it right this time.  Make this be a life change not a diet.  A diet does not work I truly want to change my life for the better in every aspect.  My motto for the 2012 is to plan the work and work the plan.

I am making a plan to do this as right as I can to include taking essential vitamins.  Vitamins that will assist me in the process of getting this weight off of my body.

 16 days until D-Day!!!

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

10 days in

I really don't know what to say!  I'm officially 2 days in and I'm doing good so far.  My family as a whole are on board with this diet and we are very focused.

Being that I work at home it makes it very easy to control what my intake is.  The problem comes in when I have to go out into the world which is super rare.  Being in Arizona I will sometimes have to do that for example this past Monday I went into my office for a vendor meeting and get some quality time in with my boss since he was visiting.

As a result the vendor comes in and buys us pizza 2 large pizzas and salad.  Not only that when I got picked up to go to my office my baba shows up with a gift of chocolate covered nuts and chocolate covered espresso beans. 

I ate no pizza and no chocolate.  I can't even state how awesome I felt conquering this. 

So beating this demon I'm like I'm ready to take this to the next level.  I'm ready to start physically moving.  I don't care if it is just a couple of minutes.  I will progress each day and track my progress.

For me it has to be something I enjoy.  I can't just start exercising and think that I'm going to consistently do it everyday.  It is not going to happen.  Maybe down the road but not to start off.  Needless to say I decided to find some workout zumba type routines on you tube and build myself up.  At least the muic is good. 

So this leads me to want to create another page that tracks my movement progress.

Here is my first warm up workout.  I was only able to last 1:33 seconds.  So sad but it is a start. 

I felt like it was something that was basic and wouldn't be very hard on me.  Let's see how far I can get tomorrow.

Saturday, April 30, 2011

1 day before the beginning of my journey ~ Again!!!

Well when we got to Arizona my husband says to me that we should wait to start on our lifestyle change because of lack money.  I had to agree with him so we stayed in survival mode.  There was not an option.  So we are going to give this a shot again!!!!!

God willing everything will be in place for us to do so.  So there were so many variables in this decision.  But let's see what happens!!!

Time to prepare the menu!!!  I will be posting my measurements etc. 

I will say I am excited about posting reviews and expanding my blog to other pages!!  I hope everyone else enjoys it as well.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

1 Day before the beginning of my journey

Ha!  Well I have 1 day until I start this journey the minute I touchdown in Arizona will be the time that carbs will no longer be in my life.  The crazy thing about it is that when I think of all of the times that I have been on Atkins one thing holds true.  When I'm on Atkins I have more energy, the pains go away, and I feel super terrific.  I wish I understood why it is so hard for me to be consistent with it knowing that things hold true.  It is so bad right now that I refuse to tell my husband that this is my plan.  I just want to do it and quit talking about it. 

Yesterday I had hamburger, calzone, fries and I'm thinking to myself the whole time I'm eating this am I truly going to be able to change my life?  I live to eat and as a result I have imposed that on my daughter.  My husband and I went to Walmart last night and as usual I get in a electric cart and we buy a couple of items and I look for the check stand that has candy because that is definitely something that I want especially on my night before my last one.  He taps me on my shoulder and  says (as I'm grabbing the candy)  That right there is why you will never get yourself out of the chair.  All I said to him was you are probably right and paid for my candy.  I don't even want to begin telling him about my journey or my plans because it will turn into something about him or us.  I'm not looking to do that.  I asked him the other day if we were going back on Atkins and he told me he didn't know.  That was all I needed to hear.  I know what I need to do for me.  This is something that just simply has to happen.  With him or without him. 

My Journey is going to be a hard one but it is one I have to take.  I feel now that I am going back to the city I will have more support and availability to get it done. 

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

How many times will I have to take this journey?

This blog simply shows me that I have gone down this journey now about 3 times. Truth be told I have gone down this journey more than 3 times it's only been 3 times that I have blogged about it.  I will say that each time I have gone through it and have blogged about it I truly felt that this was going to be the time that it was going to work.  Basically if I am going to invest the time and the energy to actually blog about my journey than it is important enough to me that I feel that I can actually succeed at the journey.  Blogging definitely for me provides me a sense of therapy.

Well here we go on to a new attempt of healthy.   It is getting,  I'm sure,  not only old for others but definitely old for me to go down this journey once again.  My husband doesn't believe I have what it takes to truly be consistent with this lifestyle let alone be consistent with just simply taking care of myself, well as it stands it truly doesn't matter what he thinks or feels about me at this point.

I have to do this.  I have to be better to me that is all there is to it.  When I look at myself I wonder how did I get here?  I didn't used to be this person that doesn't take care of herself physically in terms of her health or just her normal hygiene and environment.  You couldn't beat me going to the hairdresser or to get me a new dress.  I lost it all somewhere in my process of getting larger.

I do want to live but more important I want to be happy!

So let the new journey begin!  I am moving to a new state and city for so many reasons but mostly my job and making more money.  With this job and doing other things I have been dying to do it is truly going to place me in a situation where I have to take care of me, my appearance, and my environment better.

Let the journey begin!